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WATCH: Funniest ways to quit

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We’ve all been there — you’re sitting at the nurse’s station or lying in bed actively imagining the infinite ways you could tell your lunatic boss “I quit!”

You visualize throwing her your resignation, haphazardly stuffing a box full of your most precious locker knick-knacks and high-fiving your nurse team as you bound out of the hospital, never to return again.

Dream all you want, but when reality strikes and future recommendations and contacts are on the line, you’ll probably just neatly pack your belongings and write one heck of a resignation letter that not only sings your bosses’ praises, but also thanks your coworkers for all the “good times.”

Or will you?

Here’s a list of the funniest ways people have quit their jobs.
(Hint: they weren’t so worried about future character references…)

Quit … Virtually >>

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19 Responses to WATCH: Funniest ways to quit

  1. john hough

    i wrote this note to an employer:..”Your services as my employer are no longer required. you have been warned of your employer/employee oblications in the past and you continue to violate our agrreements reached in frequent meetings and written notifications of our verbal agreements regarding work assignments, hours, pay and overtime that you feel i must comply with. Therefore it has become necessary to terminate our professional relationship and henseforth from this day forward our relationship is terminated.

  2. sbosse

    Mine was simple. “I am outta here”.

  3. Your name

    I left my last job by calling my boss, a doctor, “a f**#$%*! egotistical prick”

  4. Deborah Rowan

    Nursing has always been a dream job… you can have loads of fun while working your a** off…, but it takes teamwork and seasoned professional leadership. I found myself working with some “managers in training” who were making the workplace unbearable. I had too much experience and not enough patience to waste on their arrogance, so I simply told the one person in the office I did respect that I needed to whistle while I worked and I moved on to a job that I could enjoy again! :)

  5. slave nurse Indiana

    on the phone with nursing supervisor … I said you get someone in here to work . I dont care who it is. I can t do that she says .. I said you can take this job and shove it square up your u know … she said what did you say … I said it again … I said come get your keys ill meet you at the door. My lawsuit got me 10,000 for a facility not to staff properly or use pool staff if they are short handed… That is dangerous to patient

  6. Jeanie

    In the middle of a horrendous shift in ICU, more vented patients than staff to provide care. the nursing Supervisor appeared, to announce in person that we needed to move the most stable unvented patient out to get yet another vented patient from the ER. I of course was charge and expected to make magic. I took a minute, went to the restroom to compose my self and emerged with my resignation written on toilet paper. She read it through, walked into the closest patient room and flushed it! I continued to work there for a few more years, before leaving to be a traveler. She has since returned to staff position and when they are having a bad shift, tells my story. The whole resignation provided the levity we needed to make it through a bad situation with no problems .

    My fantasy resignation, call in the first day of my 2 week vacation and give the 2 week notice.

  7. anonymous

    Many years ago when I was the single parent of a 3yo daughter and working rotating shifts in an ICU my baby sitter had to leave for two weeks. I tried every nurse on staff to switch the 7 nights straight I was scheduled for. Of course no one in their right mind would do that. I explained to my single childless supervisor who crisply said “Its your problem”. Infuriated I said “No, its your problem. I am not leaving a 3yo by herself for seven nights. I quit.” then walked out the door. I’ve never done anything like that since but it did feel good at the time.

  8. I was an Orthopaedic and Open Heart Surgical Nurse at a major teaching Hospital; I then Coordinated the Malignant Bone Tumor Program for a world renowned oncologist. This surely changed my outlook on life.
    In between “real jobs” and while working for an attorney who advertised on TV to acquire cases and dole them out to other attorneys while he collected 50% of the awarded monies …one day I could no longer take his outbursts of anger and abuse. The office was located in his apartment, he would come into my office leaning over my computer in his blue bathrobe, munching on grape nuts cereal and begin his daily complaints. While he was out of the office one morning, he called me. He was angry about something. I told him that:
    ‘I was leaving, that I refused to take any more of his abuse and that he had made me both physically and emotionally ill.’ I told him that I had cleared out my desk and he would find his key there. He said: “thanks for the notice, Joan.” I told him, that he did not deserve any notice, and that I was leaving.
    When I got home, I was listening to some music to calm my nerves. What was the first song that came up on my CD but “Take this job and shove it”! I immediately called his office, knowing that he never answered his phone, turned up the volume, and let it rip …I played the entire song for old Henry (name changed, sorry Henry). When I applied for unemployment, he fought me stating that I had quit without notice. I was awarded unemployment and was told that this man would not have to pay into it because they deemed him unstable and they were afraid for my safety. Best job I ever left!

  9. Your name

    I worked with an RN who won $2,000,000 on the lottery and she just walked off the job.
    COOL!
    I liked her attitude.

  10. After giving 15 years in a busy Medical Clinic with 2 shifts and 5 Doctors, the Dr’s decided they would fire their dedicated Administrater of many years and hire a women who ‘s previous job was managing a Waste Plant! What were they thinking! One by one we RN’s were replaced. By cheaper help. And we wonder why we need unions!

  11. I’m was told by the nursing staff at Highland Hospital, Oakland, California, that one ER nurse actually said this to her supervisor:

    “I just don’t know how I’m going to get along without you. But starting now, I’m going to.”

  12. Joanne

    After I reported our then DON to HR for drinking with subordinates, they did nothing to HER, but she and her cronies made my life miserable. Two months later, she and those same subordinates were involved in a major and very public display of intoxicated chaos which ended in gunfire! The entire thing made all the major and minor newspapers. The DON was forced to resign. I took six weeks leave and then told the interim DON: “You can fire me or I’ll resign…doesn’t matter to me…no letter of reference from this place would be worth the paper it was written on anyway!” After I left I sent letters to two of the surgeons who practice there letting them know of the med errors and so on that are commonly covered up. One of the surgeons resigned. Good for him.

  13. Paula

    My “best quit” is between two: My 1st job out of nursing school was in a 98 bed nursing home, which was only ever staffed with 1 SOMETIMES 2 nurses and 4 CNA’s. One day I had my fill of the backstabbing, the gossip, and the 16 hour shifts due to call-ins so I walked into the DON’s office when my shift was over and announced “I won’t be able to work tomorrow”, when she asked me why not I replied “I will be busy filling out paperwork for the next job I’ll quit when I realize they suck as bad as this place.” and I went home.
    Then there’s the last place I quit, a jail that contracts to double as a prison… where being a nurse is like walking into the twilight zone- you get into trouble for giving people cold water, or for giving a tylenol if they “don’t have the funds on their books” (money brought or sent to them by family or friends) to pay for it RIGHT NOW. So once i got tired of getting in trouble for showing the slightest compassion to people, I quit by simply calling the DON’s on-call # and letting her know that “I would not be in that day due to being unemployed”. It doesn’t pay well but being unemployed is sometimes the best short-term carreer choice you can make. :))

  14. Tricia

    I was working in a PICU, with 15 years of experience and 2 little girls at home. A new graduate, unmarried and childless, started at the same time as me. They decided to give HER Christmas off, instead of me. I went to the head nurse and asked her if I could have Christmas off. She said she couldn’t do that, so I told her right then and there: “I quit.” I wish you could have seen her jaw drop. I wasn’t missing Christmas with my babies!!

  15. Old Skool Nurse

    I have a child that is SPH. At the time (1980′s) he was less than 6 rears old. He had severe tonic-clonic convulsive grand-mal seizures. If he had more than 3 in 4 hours, it was ER time. I worked in a major psychiatric facility called DePaul. It was a multiple building place, children in one building, adolescents in one building, adults in one building, seniors in one building, etc. I worked as a medicine nurse. I would have to give medicines in two or more buildings at times. I gladly did double shifts because other nurses were quitting (I now know why they did). I had worked to the point of being so exhausted, I passed out on the floor of one of the buildings. One evening, I got a call about my baby being in the hospital. I called the on call supervisor, and gave them the narc keys. They said I couldn’t go. I said I had to go to the hospital for my baby. If I remember correctly, I was still told I could not go. I started to cry (first step in getting mad). They called the DON and she asked me: “What’s more important?” I asked her what she meant. She had the unmittigated gall to repeat it. “Is your child more important than your job?” I asked her again and she said it again!!! I started getting chills (step # 2). I said ” Bit–, Let me show you”. I walked off and went to my son. At the exit interview the DON was there and had called a male nursing supervisor (I guess for protection) to be with her. She did not ask me how my child was nor apologize for her actions although she expected me to apologize for walking off the job (I think she may still be waiting). I told her I did learn one lesson from working there and it was control; for if not for control, she would be on the floor before I walk out the door and NO ONE could stop me (She glanced at the male supervisor who was heading towards the back door). She said she would have my license for abandonment. I still have my license….I saw the Chief of Staff and his wife at the gas station a month later. He noticed I had not been there in a while and thought I was sick. I told them what happened and why. I saw someone from there several weeks later. They were full of news. One was that the DON was fired for abusive behavior to the staff….

  16. NOT REAL HAPPY

    Well after reading these great ideas i still think i have to think of a better way. Help me PLEASE. Situation, i work in a skilled unit, i agreed during the hiring process a few years ago that i would provide complete care up to six patients by myself, no lpn, no cna, nothing but me. Patients were to be highly functioning pts. Here is the situation now recently i had 9 patients by myself four were geratric psyc patients, 4 were complete care where they were constantly incontinent of bowel and bladder hourly. i changed 30 complete bed changed 7 baths, and crawled to the time clock the next am. I want a unique and special way to let this place remember me by (must be legal) my patients mean to much to me to walk off a shift. I am less than 5 years in the field and have only worked at this place. I refuse to go to another unit because they always dumb 7 of the death bed any minute or need to be in icu pts on me. My compassion, strong work ethic, and strong supervisory skills should be paid off with more than money but with gratitude as well. My pay is always charge but that does not make up the work load.

    • shoofly RN

      If you are just asking for advice in ‘how’ to quit your yucky job (as opposed to how to quit in a clever manner) without shooting yourself in the foot for future jobs I suggest you follow the policy of your place of employment. Two weeks notice (or 30 days, whatever they expect); draft a polite written notice of intent to terminate, keep your emotions under wraps during the 2 weeks/30 days, do the best you can with your patients, and spend time looking for a better job. Getting a good recommendation — even from an employer you do not respect– can go far in landing a good job. Once you have a new job and you are no longer employed there, THEN you can complain to them all you want about working conditions, etc. As much fun as it is to tell your boss to “take this job and shove it” (and believe me, we all WANT to at some time or another), it is not in your best interest to quit in that manner. Signed: An “Old” Nurse. Successfully employed for over 30 years.

  17. Molalla Shiloh

    I did just quit…my 1st CNA job. After only 3 wks on the job (2 wks ago) I gave a 1 month notice, last day to be eff Aug 28, so I could get a decent referral – if necessary. But last Sat, the charge kept riding me for the pissy-ist things ALL night long! I had 12 residents & was running like a crazy woman trying to keep on top of everything. At the end of shift, she took me into the conf rm & gave me a written “verbal counseling” (with a witness). Her biggest complaint: not providing immediate oral care on a new resident when I took the time instead to change 3 poopy briefs on bed-ridden patients. The next morning I called the DNS & politely advised her she had 5 hrs to find my replacement for that night & “I AM DONE! Thank you for the opportunity to work here! Good-bye!” & hung up.

  18. wahela LPN

    Not me, but a friend was working the back office in the local clinic. Her doctor got mad about something and began yelling at my friend. she backed him into a wall, stuck her finger in his face and said, “If you ever yell at me or are disrespectful again, you will be running the back office all by yourself.’ And she walked away. ten minutes later, her Doctor came up to her, said, “Excuse me, I am sorry. Please stay.” He was never disrespectful again. I loved it. he is known as a very difficult doctor, but he is always very nice to his nurse.