See the current issue of Scrubs Magazine

Kids say the darndest things…

Ryan McVay | Lifesize | Getty Images

Little kids are some of my favorite patients. They really do, like Bill Cosby and Art Linkletter joked, say the darndest things. I was triaging a kid the other day, she was about 4 years old—let’s call her Molly. She had been sent from her pediatrician’s office for a “removal.” It was apparent that this sweet thing had been asked the same questions over and over and her patience was running thin.

ME: So, Molly, what did you put in your nose?

Molly: (big sigh) A CRAYON.

ME: What color is the crayon?

Molly: (she did not think this was as funny as I did and releases an even bigger sigh) BLUE.

ME: Why did you put the crayon up your nose?

Molly: (So irritated at this point that she actually rolled her eyes…I didn’t even know that 4 year old kids could do that!) I DON’T KNOW!!!

This was not Molly’s first rodeo. Tell me your funniest kid story!

SEE MORE IN:
,

Rebekah Child

Rebekah Child attended the University of Southern California for her bachelor's in nursing and decided to brave the academic waters and return for her master's in nursing education, graduating in 2003 from Mount St. Mary's. Rebekah has also taught nursing clinical and theory at numerous Southern California nursing schools and has been an emergency nurse since 2002. She is currently one of the clinical educators for an emergency department in Southern California and a student (again!) in the doctoral program at the University of California, Los Angeles.
By

Post a Comment

You must or register to post a comment.

2 Responses to Kids say the darndest things…

  1. Amurichu

    I work in a peds intensive care, and we swab everyones nose on admission for MRSA. Now, everyone knows you don’t just run up to a five year old and shove a qtip up their nose, so I’ve used some creative ways to approach it and got some equally creative responses. This comes from a five year old boy.
    Me: Have you ever picked a booger?
    Patient: Well, Yea! (Duhh!)
    Me: Well, I have to take this little qtip here, and pick one of your boogers, okay?
    Patient: (somewhat exasperated) Well, they’re all gone!
    Me: Well, I just have to try anyway. It will be real quick and it won’t hurt at all.
    Patient: (Sticks out his pointer finger which happens to have a small green burger rolled up on it and says in a most helpful tone) Here you go, I’ve already got one for you!

  2. Amurichu

    I work in a pediatric intensive care unit and we swab every patient’s nose on admission for MRSA. Everyone knows you can’t just run up on a five year old and shove a qtip up their nose, so I’ve come up with some creative approaches to do my test and avoid the kicking/screaming. I’ve also gotten some equally creative responses from my patients. The best one comes from a five year old boy.
    Me: Have you ever picked a booger?
    Patient: Well, Yea! (Duuhhh!)
    Me: Well, I have to take this little qtip here and pick one of your boogers. (I show him the qtip). Are you ready?
    Patient: Well, they’re all gone! (exasperated expression)
    Me: Well, I have to try once anyway. I’m just going to tickle your nose.
    Patient: (Reaches out his pointer finger to me, which happens to have a perfectly rolled green booger on the end of it and in his most helpful tone says) Here, I already have one for you!

shares