iStockphoto | Thinkstock
Sometimes the things you hear on your shift are funnier than any sitcom on TV! We asked you what you’ve overheard from the nurse’s station recently (see the first, second, third and fourth versions of these hilarious anecdotes here) and we weren’t disappointed! Here are the best conversations you’ve been hearing.
1. P.T.
Nurse 1: That patient needs P.T.
Nurse 2: The physical therapist was just in to see him.
Nurse 1: No, not that kind of P.T., I mean pillow therapy.
Nurse 2: What’s that?
Nurse 1: When you place the pillow firmly over the patient’s face!
Overheard by Marjorie
2. The KILLING FIELD
A deceased resident’s family member brought in a live plant and asked if we would like it. My co-charge nurse responded, “No way. We kill things here.” She immediately realized what she said, but the family member didn’t catch it. We still laugh about that one.
Overheard by Tami
3. SEDUCT-ATIVE
Patient’s wife: The nurse just went in to seduce my husband.
(She meant “sedate”!)
Overheard by Deldonna
4. VISITATION RIGHTS
Patient: (to home health nurse) No, I don’t want you to come for a visit today.
Nurse: Oh, why?
Patient: I don’t feel good!
Overheard by Annette
5. THE BODY ELECTRIC
Patient: Nurse, my electric lights aren’t on!
(He meant “electrolytes.”)
Overheard by Nurse Farmer
6. MY SON HURTS!
Dad: (pointing to his little boy’s genital area) It hurts him down there.
Nurse: Do you mean his testicles hurt?
Dad: Yeah, and his balls hurt, too.
Overheard by Andrea
What have you overheard recently? Share it in the comments section below!
RN
Registered Nurse
During a moc code, your could hear coming out of a pt ‘s room, the compression team singing ” another opne bites the dust”
Phone call to the ED:
Caller: “Can I get AIDS if I accidentally gave another guy a blow job?”
Me: “…”
LPN
Licensed Practical Nurse
Nurse: did you have all your babies vaginally or any sections?
Patient: aww naw they was all sexual!
RN1: That pt needs an immediate defenestration!!
RN2: Whats that?
RN1: Thrown out the window!!