image: © istockphoto.com/Tomasz Wojnarowicz

Have you ever uttered one of these phrases to a female nurse before? I’m not going to say I did…but you won’t be hearing me say them any time in the future. This is all fun and games, of course (except for maybe #1, let’s be honest)!

1. Bad hair day today?

This is not just because yours truly has no hair (although it doesn’t help). It’s all fun and games until the ‘hair’ card is pulled – then it’s a no-holds-barred war over why you think their hair looks bad. Did it always look bad? Is it the color? Is it too short? Is it too long? Should it be pulled up?… (this list is endless)

2. Is it that time of the month?

This should only be said from afar. If you’re close enough to be hit- you will be. ‘Nuff said.

3. Oh! Hey? Do you have makeup on?

This comment ranks up there with the hair comment. The fact that you have noticed something about their complexion will start a river of questions concerning whether or not they have always looked bad and why haven’t you said something before.

4. Do those match?

I always love the ‘void of knowledge’ most male nurses – heck, most men – have when it comes to matching. Oh – wait, maybe this is just me?

5. There’s no crying in nursing.

Yes this is stolen – have you seen the movie “A League of Their Own?” You gotta love Tom Hanks. And this can be quite debilitating. Be careful.

Of course this is all in fun. Don’t take any of this seriously, nor think for one second I or other male nurses would actually these mean and horrible things. It’s just fun knowing that we men working in an obviously female-dominated profession have a good grasp on our co-workers sensitivities.

It’s kind of like a married man knowing what to say and what NOT to say to his loving wife.

Right?

Creatas | Thinkstock

I was inspired to pay tribute to the men of nursing after reading this recent comment from one of our brothers in the profession:

I am a nursing student, and about the “man card” thing. I am a former Corporal in the Marine Corps infantry. I first got interested in healthcare in Iraq doing combat medicine, like taking care of bullet wounds, burns, and fragment wounds from IEDs. I know who I am and if someone gives me a hard time about being a nursing student, it just show me that they are overcompensating for something. As long as I am providing for my wife and son, I don’t care what other people think. I want to be a flight nurse because I like working in high-pressure jobs.

First, THANK YOU for serving, Corporal!

Second, does everyone realize just how new women are to nursing? Particularly trained, educated women from all walks of life?

2000 years ago, nursing school was for men only!

Most of the first nurses in recorded history were members of male religious orders. Many hospitals still bear their names. Some are even canonized as Saints.

When Florence went to Scutari in the Crimean War, she had to integrate her nurses into a system in which only MEN had cared for other soldiers. So men were the first military nurses–in part because only men were permitted to serve in the Army. Also, Victorian beliefs did not permit close physical contact between persons of the opposite sex unless they were married.

During the Civil War, more women worked on the front lines caring for the wounded. Many of these nurses were private citizens whose homes stood on the battlefields and had been pressed into service at field hospitals. Able-bodied men were needed for the fighting. The names that we recall from history–Clara Barton, Mary Ann Bickerdyke, and Dorothea Dix–were mostly volunteers who simply managed to outlast the doctors who opposed them.

During the two World Wars of the 20th century, men were still the only battlefield nurses, while women served in hospitals and on ships. The same continues today. The difference is that a field medic is more of a surgeon who administers lifesaving treatment according to protocols and does not have to wait for a specific order from an MD. He does not have time to wait for orders, as he is working within that Golden first hour of trauma care which makes the difference between life and limb.

Somewhere in the Baby Boomer generation, nursing became known as a “womens’ profession.” It seemed that nobody remembered that it was a male domain for most of its existence! (Perhaps it was the sexy white uniforms and caps that did it?)

The few men who bothered to attend nursing school in the latter part of the 20th century had to put up with all sorts of restrictions: they weren’t allowed in the delivery rooms when a woman was “exposed” (although male doctors were!); they had to have a female “escort” for performing catheterizations; and they were barred from certain clinical areas, like labor and delivery.

And, of course, there is the sexual assumption that became pervasive in the late 1970′s–”He’s a nurse? Well, he must be gay!” I have no doubt that most of our guys have been subjected to this. Isn’t it odd that we never seem to make the same assumption about women? (“A female doctor? She must be a lesbian!”)

Hang in there, Marine! This profession needs a Few MORE Good Men such as yourself. I wish you “fair winds and following seas” as you move forward in your career.

And, as always, Semper Fi!

        “But we in it shall be remember’d;
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother”…   -William Shakespeare, Henry V

iStockphoto + Scrubs

For some strange reason, some people feel that because I work in a predominantly female field, my “man card” was revoked.

Seriously?

Side note: I often wonder if this urban legend stems from the “male nurses are gay” stereotype.

So, back to my “man card.”

It seems that a new study, as mentioned in “Putting the stereotypes to bed: Study finds male nurses are MORE masculine than other men,” is out to debunk this humorous urban legend.

In this small study, researchers surveyed 109 current nursing students from 37 states. The subjects rated male nursing students as displaying more “manly” characteristics than male college students in majors other than nursing. This was a very limited study, but nonetheless is interesting to note.

Drawing from my own experiences as a nurse, I honestly can’t say my “masculinity” ever has been questioned. And no, after I passed my boards the masculinity police did not confiscate my “man card.” I didn’t become a nurse because I thought it was more or less manly than other professions; I made a conscious decision to impact lives. This urban legend, like all the others, is just a great conversation piece.

The take home message is this: To all the men out there who are considering this profession or are entering it, be prepared. The individuals that question your masculinity or believe in any of these other urban legends do not know us. And those that know us, know the difference.

Any of my fellow “masculine” nurses out there care to share your thoughts?

P.S. Be sure to read this with a thick dose of sarcasm.

P.A.: Do you have any questions?

Teenager: Yeah, will cigarette smoke show up in my urine sample?

Overheard by M. Patterson

———

Nurse 1: What do you do for stress?

Nurse 2: Yoga and shooting shotguns, mostly.

———

Female: The medicine made my teeth feel like they were floating in my head.

Male: All of ‘em?

Overheard by G. Nunez

———

Person: I was finally able to repair the coffee table while I was waiting for the ambulance to arrive.

Overheard by K. Chang

———

Oveheard in a Waiting Room

Mother (to child): Sit down and start acting like you’re sick.

Overheard by D. Ludlow

———

Guy One: Did you see that nurse?

Guy Two: Which one?

Guy One: The one with the shoes.

Overheard by R. Armstrong

———

Admitting Clerk: How old is your son?

Man: 27

Admitting Clerk: Then whose child is that?

Man: I don’t know.

Overheard by L. Winslow

———

Nurse 1: You know what’s longer than a 12-hour shift?

Nurse 2: What?

Nurse 1: A 12-hour shift with no chairs.

———

Nurse: I’ve been wearing a Batman t-shirt under my scrubs ever since I started working evening shift.

———

Nurse: The patient’s fine. It’s his mother-in-law I can’t stand.

Got any of your own “overheard” stories? Share them below!

Photos.com | Getty Images

How does a man survive in a woman’s world? Here are some down-and-dirty survival tips that every ‘male nurse’ needs to know in order to survive in the wilderness of women.

Learn the ways of the Venutians

Men are truly from Mars, and yes Women are from Venus. We live on two different worlds, but we do occupy the same solar system. We speak different languages (spoken and bodily language). Social habits are on opposite ends of the pole. And we of course can’t agree on much other than the fact we are different. But, I guarantee you can all find commonality -which is being a nurse.

Never, ever, ever under any circumstances be that ‘typical’ man

OK guys. We have all heard the stereotype stories. Learn to not be THAT guy while at work. Even if you are, or can be, don’t be that guy at work of all places. If you’re not sure look around you? Are you always left high and dry? Little to no teamwork from the team? Always eating your meals alone? (hmm.. You might need to re-evaluate). If all else fails, simply ask a Venutian, they love to tell it like it is.

Learn to love the color pink (oh.. and candles too)

I’m not sure why, it just is. Never question, just assimilate – it’s safer that way.

Emotions are not what they seem

Crying is a form of trickery. Just because someone smiles and laughs at your jokes, does not mean they like you. When you hear them whispering, be sure to never look them in the eye. On the playground, guys will punch you in the face if they don’t like you, or have a dispute. After the punch, and the dust settles respect is exchanged and then call it even. In the wilderness women will find a way to extend their torture and mayhem over months at a time, redirecting their havoc to everything that affects you and then never fully admit their angst. Be careful, be very careful.

Being invisible is a good thing

Hypothetically speaking of course. When you become invisible, you are no longer viewed as the ‘male nurse’ or the ‘guy’ they work with. Now you’re just a fellow co-worker, or colleague. Camouflage is your best defense.

Always put the toilet seat down!

In most cases you are usually one of the few men working that shift, so when the seat is left up, the blame game gets REAL easy. Oh yeah, and if you fail to even move the seat during your ‘visit’, you better leave things in the same condition you found them. (Do I really need to explain the dribble effect??) Don’t ever let an angry wet-bottomed women corner you – you will not survive.

Disclaimer: Yes, once again this is all in fun. Anyone who is a ‘male nurse’ or works with them can take some humor from this post. In the end we are all part of the same awesome team. Gender is never an issue, until you make it an issue. All in fun…

"The Best is Yet to Come," Acrylic on Canvas by Christina Impoco Nieves, NP

Nurses are a special breed of people.

They get up in the morning and go to work with one simple, yet profound purpose in mind: “I will care for you.”

When asked what the most important tool in their workday is, every great nurse would surely answer, “My heart.”

Poems

Hearts
The heart of a nurse
There is a rose that grows

Stories

I want to work in a hospital
Heart to heart with my patient
The odd behavior of a nurse
The language of the heart

Art

The best is yet to come

Quotes

The heart is my tool
Constant attention
When you’re a nurse
Heaven

Ablestock.com | Getty Images | Thinkstock

Heard at the lunch table on campus the other day, “I sometimes miss working in the mill”.

This spawned quite the conversation, I must tell you. The conversation topic involved the ‘pulse’ of the nursing profession and its  sometimes palpable cut-throat atmosphere. I think you’ve heard it before. Nurses can be ‘catty’, and cliques seem to be a very common occurrence on nursing units.

“We need more men in nursing”

(I must say I wasn’t expecting this statement). When I inquired as to why we need more men in nursing, the response was not what I expected (or hoped).

“Most men confront you when there is conflict. They tell you how they feel right to your face. They speak their business and move on.” “Women do just the opposite”

Catty: Subtly cruel or malicious; spiteful (Free Dictionary)

As you can tell this was quite the venting session amongst a small group of nurses. It seems that a lot of nurses feel that the majority of nurses are following a horrible stereotype. Apparently most women can be quite mean?

As you can see I’m writing this blog post with a lot of question marks. I’m wondering just how true these opinions really are. Or should I say, how common are these feelings outside of my lil’ world of nursing?

I have to bashfully admit something though. I found great humor in this conversation. Mostly because I’ve heard this before. But more specifically, I found it highly entertaining that I was the only man in this conversation.

I for one think that there is a shred of truth to these thoughts, but I’m not so convinced that they are gender specific. I’ve met a lot of cruel men and women in my professional career thus far. I don’t think the ‘meanness’ trait has some strange exclusivity to the X chromosome. But it sure makes you wonder.

So folks, what do you think?

Are most nurses catty?

If they are, why? And what the heck can we do about it?

Image: Ocean Illustration | Veer

What would a Halloween party be without a naughty nurse? What porn movie isn’t complete without the rather large-chested and always available nurse? And then, of course, there are the soap operas (and seemingly legit evening medical dramas) with the pouty-lipped nurses who are out to nab Dr. Right. Is it any wonder why nurses are fed up with how we’re portrayed in the media?

It’s not as if nurses don’t have a sense of humor. Heck, you have to be able to laugh to do what we do, right? But there’s a line—and it’s not that fine a line—between laughing with nurses and laughing at them. And when people are laughing at them, you can bet there’s less respect for the profession. Nursing isn’t the only profession that has stereotypes – librarians and policewomen are just two examples.

We nurses have to do our part to educate people about what the profession is really about. We certainly have our work cut out for us! Take a look at this list, then roll up your sleeves!

Here are 10 nurse depictions (with some horrifying examples!) we wish would go away:

1. Naughty Halloween Nurse
2. Addicted Nurse
3. Sex Object Nurse
4. Celebrities as Hot Nurses
5. Fetish Nurses
6. Nurse Ratched
7. Sexy (and Usually Gay) Male Nurse
8. Servant Nurse
9. Soap Opera Nurse
10. Bimbo/Helpless Nurse

FIRST: We’ve NEVER dressed like that.

Image: © iStockphoto.com

Nursing can be very physical work, from leaning over your patients to take their blood pressure to administering an IV to lifting a patient to a gurney. It’s all part of the job.

No matter what you’re doing at work, looking professional is a necessity. No matter where you work, you’re representing the hospital or medical office. Looking like a competent and qualified nurse is essential.

Here are five tips (with helpful visuals…ahem!) to help you be mindful of fashion blunders!

(1) Watch the cleavage
(2) Steer clear of stains
(3) Too tight ain’t right
(4) No peek-a-boo, please
(5) High waters = low marks

First, watch the cleavage…

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