Top 10 nursing student diagnoses

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Nursing students (and concerned friends), diagnose yourselves and tell us, are you in suffering from one of these [ahem] ailments particular to your situation?

10. Fluid volume deficit r/t dehydrating effects of caffeine

9. Impaired social interactions r/t inappropriate topics of conversation discussing bodily functions

8. Anxiety r/t time constraints, threatened loss of social activities and anticipation of constant clinical quizzing

7. Functional constipation r/t lack of time to go to the bathroom associated with moving at speed of light and still not getting everything done

6. Impaired skin integrity r/t decubitus ulcer formation from sitting for long periods of time while studying

5. Ineffective breathing pattern r/t anxiety attacks before exams

4. Risk for self-injury r/t excessive carrying of 2,000-lb. textbooks

3. Sleep pattern disturbance r/t waking up at 4 a.m. for clinical after getting to sleep at 2 a.m. from working on care plans

2. Altered thought process: caffeine-induced psychosis r/t increased coffee consumption

1. Self-care deficit r/t being a nursing student

This list submitted by Clara Zipp, RN. If you are suffering from any of the above, you can commiserate with your fellow student nurses at

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One Response to Top 10 nursing student diagnoses

  1. William

    Now I know my calling: cooking for nurses and making them laugh. Kitchen clown. Gets them laughing so hard they can barely make it to the can. Yes. This is it.

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