Caffeine is my shepherd

Image: Hemera | Thinkstock

Caffeine is my shepherd;

With it beside me, I shall not doze.

It maketh me wake in green pastures:

It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses.

It restoreth my buzz:

It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its namesake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction,

I will fear no Equalâ„¢:

For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar, they comfort me.

Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of The Starbucks:

Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over.

Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life:

and I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever.

Editor’s note: Thanks to for this delightful…and memorable…prayer.

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