Let’s just get right down to it:
- Fish. Really, why do people do this? It will stink up your ENTIRE department. Please cease and desist this practice immediately.
- Broccoli. Please see above.
- Popcorn. Hello fire alarm. 9 times outta 10 it will get burned and your hospital’s chief nursing officer will threaten to take away all your microwaves.
- Aluminum foil. I thought this one was obvious but someone proved me wrong the other day. Hint: It sparks.
- Anything pumpkin. Why? Because it makes me want to eat an entire pumpkin pie. Smells too yummy.
- Spaghetti. (Unless you put a lid on it.) It splatters EVERYWHERE and then looks like some kind of Kenmore crime scene for the next person who uses it.
- Pita bread. This is for your own good. It is a fine line between warm, yummy pita bread and a hockey puck.
- Tomato soup. (see number 6).
- Styrofoam cups. They melt and stink when they melt. Really badly.
- Apple pie (see number 5). The exception to this one is if you bring enough for me. Then please, heat away. And I hope you brought some ice cream to go with it.
Got any other items or rules to add to this list?