The top 10 things nurses wish it were IMPOSSIBLE for patients to do!

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Have you ever sighed after a patient demanded a glass of water that was exactly 72 degrees warm or some better-tasting food (um, not gonna happen!)?

Join the club!

We asked our Facebook fans for the one thing they’d make impossible for all patients to do. If you’ve ever responded to your patient’s 35th call bell ring in an hour, we know you’ll be nodding along with them!

The top 10 things nurses wish it were impossible for patients to do!

1. Viewing the “H” as the Hilton, not the HOSPITAL…
—Tina Lester Jones

2. Butt grabbing. As a male nurse, I can say you never want to give an 82-year-old nun an Ambien at 9 pm. She’s a different woman at 2 a.m.
—Jerry Koenn

3. I would make Internet access impossible. That’s right, Mrs. Doe, no WebMD or Mayo Clinic, just smart nurses who dedicated half of their lives to educating themselves so they can take care of you!
—Katerina Milcheva

4. Lying. I would venture to say that if any ER doc walked out into the waiting room, stood on a chair and yelled, “Who is here just for Vicodin?” you would empty out about 60 percent of the patients.
—Scott A. Rimer

5. Calling to see what the wait times are and who the doctor(s) are in the ED today! (They don’t get either bit of info, but they still call!) IF YOU HAVE TIME TO CALL AND ASK…IT’S NOT AN EMERGENCY! STAY HOME!
—Vicki Ovitt Lyons

6. It should be against the law to tell the nurse your pain is a 10/10, and when the doc rounds, “Any complaints?”, the patient says, “No, I’m just fine,” with a huge smile on her face. Geesh!
—Dana Campbell

7. Family who have been told to step out and wait in the waiting room while care is given, then sneak back in and try to peep around the curtain! I want to say, “If you are so darn interested, clean them up yourself!”
—Susan Goodall Aliff Gordy

8. Abusing the call light! If it is in reach and your arms aren’t broken, don’t ask me to get it!
—Apryl Lee

9. Hunting me down like a big game animal! There are call lights for a reason!
—Tammy Kirby Suttles

10. Pulling out a Foley. I didn’t wanna do it the first time and I most certainly don’t wanna do it again!
—Melody Beier

What’s the one thing you’d make impossible for your patients to do?

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11 Responses to The top 10 things nurses wish it were IMPOSSIBLE for patients to do!

  1. jetalynne

    1 thing I have always hated is when a patient yells “nurse!!!!!!” from in their room and you go running down the hall as fast as you can thinking it’s an emergency, then when you get there they ask something like “i would like some more water” and you see their call light sitting right next to them! Drives me crazy! lol

  2. nursebrittany

    I wish it were illegal for a patient to verbally beraid the PACU nurse about how “mean and inhumane” they treat the patient when they are repeatedly told they cannot have water while they’re waking up from surgery in recovery. It’s a win : win for everyone…you don’t vomit and aspirate, while I don’t have to clean up your vomit and call for an emergency intubation!

  3. deadeyenurse

    complain of ‘bomiking’ while eating fried chicken.
    talking on cellphone while asking patient health related questions
    plugging in cell phone as soon as you hit the er door

  4. baseagle13

    I absoluteky hate it when there are 12 family members in the room…who all care for mom at home, but call me to “clean her up.” Is is really necessary for me to see her naked too…all of you have! And then, tell me how to do the job…if you know how…then do it!

  5. madscientistRN

    Asking me to feed them. Especially after using a hairbrush, putting on make-up, and using the toilet. Your arms aren’t broken.

  6. Sarz1066

    I don’t know how “impossible to pull out an IV” isn’t on here! Gotta love when the confused pt is just sitting in bed playing with it.

  7. rubberduckies100

    Call bells should be like PCAs. Hit it once and it makes you wait until it will let you ring again….

  8. prettybabyb85

    when they’re half dying in the ER chest pains,shortness of breath,unsteady etc. but once they get to the floor… ” I need 4 pillows ,2 gowns , this tv don’t work, where’s my tray at?? I’m hungry, I need a phone, 1 soap ? I can’t wash myself with this, where’s my nurse at I need my meds oh I can’t get it yet then I need a breathing treatment! ”

    did you want a hospital or hotel??

  9. handsoffmymail

    People ring the call bell directly at 2100 and when you stop passing meds to go see what they need, they say, oh my meds are due and I thought you should know that. Needless to say, the immediately move to the last patient to get medications.

  10. LeavingAMA

    I was a ward clerk years ago prior to becoming a nurse, i could write volumes. 😉 I had a pretty anxious patient call his wife from the hospital, and SHE in turn called 911 because he said he wasn’t feeling well. 911 dispatch called the front desk and I asked if they were planning on sending an ambulance to the hospital to take him to the hospital. This was the only hospital in the area, mind you.

    Also at that same job, I had a patient look up his surgeon’s home phone number in the phone book and called the surgeon’s wife in the middle of the night because he was unhappy with his pain meds. Lesson learned: make sure your number is unlisted.

    Re: #5, the hospital I currently work at has introduced a smartphone app to check our ER waiting times. I just can’t see this ending well.

  11. Ahunternurse

    I honestly wish it was impossible for patients to fall. Every time I hear any loud noise or a bed alarm I jump up like a crazy person. It’s like PTSD lol…